Realistic expectations

http://www.mmilani.com/3281/commentary-201007/

I saw this the other day, and needed to see it. It made me of two minds. With Duncan as my partner, I would disagree that it's too much to ask a dog to be a service dog and more. With Keeper, I'm finding that in fairness, asking her to be a service dog pretty much is the limit of what she's up for doing.

Keeper's a very good service dog for me in many ways. She's very easy to live with, tries very hard to be right, and is generally undemanding. However, she doesn't push me to do more, or motivate me to get out and train just to train. She's smart, but she's not wicked smart and mischievous if left 'alone' to think up things. She's a homebody and an introvert, but she wants to go with me, and likes helping, so she enjoys her job.

Duncan was almost too much dog for me as a youngster. Four hours at the lake throwing his bumper so he'd have his needs met was right at the limit of what I could do. He needed me to be better- at training, at managing him, at giving him a job. He was a great service dog for college, especially once I had a core group of friends and when we'd go hang out I'd relax and he'd wrestle them. He was a gregarious, socially motivated dog. He got a charge out of making people laugh, and he liked meeting new people so much that I used "go say hi" as a reward for him.

If I'd been up for it, I think he would have loved being a therapy dog on top of being a service dog. He schmoozed with guests when they came over, worked the crowd for petting and treats, played with dogs at the dog park (when I still trusted people to only bring mentally and socially stable dogs to the dog park), played with our neighbor's Brittany for hours when I cut it back to doggy play dates, and was just a lot of attitude and joy (and work) to live with. If he didn't have a job, he made up jobs for himself- usually digging holes and barking and eating food on the counter. I couldn't slack off with him, and he kept me motivated.

Keeper's not challenging in the same way. She's not as social. She'd rather hang out in the same room than wrestle, rather go on parallel walks with new dogs than play with them, and if she doesn't have a job at that moment, she snoozes like a 100 pound bear rug.

I've had a hell of a case of Second Dog Syndrome. Keeper is not Duncan. She's doing the same job in an almost entirely different way. She is a very good dog, and I think my parents prefer living with Miss Easy-Going over Mister Entertain Me! Maybe it's working with him first, maybe it's just my preferences, but I'm going back to Strider's breeder and hoping to get another gregarious, adventurous, active dog. I love Keeper, and I try not to ask too much of her... but I really miss having a dog who had the energy reserves to do it all, and wanted to be that busy.

Little day-to-day things

I was having a less than stellar night last night. Poor Keeper. I knelt down to pick up a DVD that had fallen, and she turned to look just as I was lifting it and I elbowed her in the muzzle. I clipped her with a book I dropped later. Finally, as we were leaving (after weeks of encouraging her to go faster on the stairs because my balance has been good or I've been taking the elevator) I tripped and caught myself on the back of her neck/shoulders. Not too hard, as I also had a hand on the railing. She kept me from faceplanting without missing a step, but judging by the Disapproving School Marm glare I received, I have a feeling we're going to be going s_l_o_w from here on out. Fluffy Knows Best, I'm just impatient... and probably should have taken the elevator. She forgave me for all of that much faster than she's forgiving me for cleaning her ears.

Hot and humid weather and her winter coat growing in made her ears yeasty again. I buzzed the hair in front of her ears so there's air flow and have been cleaning them twice a day with an equal parts apple cider, rubbing alcohol and water mix the last couple days. Looks like we're winning over the wee beasties. She dislikes the ear cleaning, but comes right back afterward because I dole out so many cookies for the discomfort. The Setters disappear for a half hour or more each time I clean Keeper's ears.

On the plus side, she's been getting sassy with our sometimes cooler mornings. We're both hoping for a long, crisp fall and lots of snow this winter.

"Play" time

I've been letting out a neighbor's dog for them mid-day while they're at work. Most times I bring Keeper with me. Rusty would like (very much!) to play rough and tumble and be the chaser, not the chased. Keeper would prefer he be polite, or be the chaser. These do seem to be mutually exclusive states of being. I may take a Setter next time.

I find her reluctance to engage with Rusty to be interesting, and the stress drool when we visit his house very indicative of her awareness of social rank. She *knows* she's on another dog's territory, and would like not to be. That I see no such stress response on walks or when she's working fascinates me. It is not the distance from our home, or the strangeness that's getting to her, it is the fact that we're in "enemy" territory, even with the "enemy" bouncing along side going "play now? Now? Now?"

When he's been over here, she's aloof because he's rude, but not stressed.

Complex instincts at work here. I'm sure I'm missing some of it, but it is very interesting to watch.

After I'd put Rusty back in his crate, we went straight to the library to grab some books, and all was right with Keeper's understanding of the world.

She's not the brightest, or the most daring, adventuresome soul, but she tries, and what she does understand, she does very well. She's steady, reliable, easy. Even when she's got great gobs of spit hanging under her chin, she still listens and works for me. I love her to pieces.

Keeper- gratitude

When all I hear is the squeal of brakes
When all I see is the blue smoke billowing
When all I can do is brace for an impact
That has already passed

When I tense up and stop breathing
When I break out into a full body sweat
When my hands are slick and trembling
With a fear from years ago

She comes and rests her head on me
She pushes those thoughts away
She makes it so I can see today
And not be trapped in that wreck

If I smile and laugh and go out
If I explore and experience and enjoy
If I live a life unfettered
It is because of her